Poslané v Fórum Nemecko
I'm hearing lots of terrible stories about German men and their lack of romance. Is this true? Anybody got any "real-life experience"? :-)
Hey
zaslal Andreea Maria v Fórum Nemecko
I am in a relationship with a german man since november, but is really hard to understand him.
We met online, we are both living in England and met after 3 weeks of long chat via whatsapp or skype. I guess I was in love with him evan before we met, he was so funny and smart and considerate. He drove 120 miles just to meet me and on those 2 first days together he was the moat amazing man I have ever dated, took me out for dinner, we drove to the sea side just for cuple of hours, he was holding my hand while driving, kissed me all the time...
I don't know if my mistake was that I let him know my feelings for him, but after we decided to get involved more seriously everything changed. We broke up after 1 month because he tought the things between us are not going in the direction that we wanted, and he did it by pushing me away, being cold.
He went to Germany for Christmas and after 1 week of not talking he started chatting with me again, we agreed to be friends but when I told him I will try dating another man he just told me one night that he loved me and then decided to try things again.
The first thing he did after landing back from Germany was driving again 120 miles to see me, and he started again to be caring and adorable.
I moved with my job and life closer to him so we didn't had to face the long distance relationship but things changed again, he said he dosen't know what feelings he has for me, but he likes to be with me, I was expecting to see him more often but he only would come once a week around.
We broke up again for few days because he said he thinks he is not the man I want...got back together and I decided to give him more space.
It is hard for me, I am a latin, I really know what I want and I really love him. But it is hard to let go as well.
He might be cold and insensitive, but he has that "I don't know what" that makes me crazy about him.
He dosen't say I miss you, he dosen't say ' hey babe, come over, I want to be with you tonight' , I have to be the one makes those steps.
So I don't know, they are not what a warm hearted woman wants, but they can really make you love them without knowing why.
finding a boyfreind
zaslal Sara HA v Fórum Nemecko
It's already seven months I'm in Germany and actually I couldnt find a boyfriend to stay with. I never had this problem before in any other countries.
First in Germany, the only place you can find a boyfriend is Uni, night clubs, or private partys.
Second for example in a party or sth, they never come to you. They might look at you but they dont dare to come and start a convesation. Accoding to my experiences, ones who come are mostly jerks. It seems good ones never come to you!! That's therrible.
Third if in any case you start a conversation and they DARE to ask for your number, they dont call you! For me, I always think ther are not interested but my German girlfriends say that a girl should call first!!
Four even if you call and everything is Ok, it takes toooooo long so sth happen. It takes weeks so you can date for the first time. They dont call, they dont text, they do nothing!
2 weeks ago I met one German guy whom I thought is a little bit different. I liked him. Unlike other German guys i've met, he was funny! he laughed! and he was not boring like others and I thought he liked me too... I mean he acted in a way that I had this feeling. And he told me things like "You are so cute." "You are really beautiful" and so on. He had my number but he never called. According to what my friends here always say, I texted him twice and he replied very well... very interested, but after that, again nothing happened! I havent received any call from him and I thought it is not nice anymore that I send a message again. He should do sth now. But nothing! I'm really confused and bored. I never had problem for finding a boyfriend and now it looks like sth impossible.
German Men
zaslal Tatia Silagava v Fórum Nemecko
Oh come on people! I have a lot of German friends and they're really nice and sweet. They're also gentlemen. And they're not as moody and non talkative as u say.. Why do u expect a guy to just come up to you in the street and start a conversation? U say it's unpolite not to do that, not to smile at women in the streets and stuff.. but ur wrong, I would feel very offended if some stranger came to me and just started talking and giving me compliments. I think Germans are very polite this way.. : )) It's not nice to go to someone and tell them they're adorable and ur amazed by them :D lol and I don't think Latino lovers are romantic.. ))
German Men
zaslal Laurie Perkins v Fórum Nemecko
Although indeed there are some cultural differences between Americans and Germans. I would pick a German man over an American man any day of the week. Although, also to win their true affections may take a while to do. I would much rather have a guy that says it like it is and means what he says, than a guy who says always all the pretty stuff and never means a word of it.
I have noticed that German men are not big on compliments (for the most part) So after striving for hours to look sexy and cute you may just render a slight recognition like, "you look nice" :-) In the beginning my first reaction was to say something like, "are you kidding, nice????" But over time I see this is not exactly a bad comment, conservative for sure, but so is the German ( in general). I have met some German men that were great at conversation and actually have the art of flirting down very well...but beware, if you find one this way, there maybe a good reason why he is so good at it....and proceed with caution! But this can hold true for all men and not just Germans.
How do you know if a German guy likes you ??? Confused
zaslal sophia bell v Fórum Nemecko
I need some advice about a first date I had recently, it went really well, good chemistry, mutual attraction, lots of affection demonstrated, he kept smiling at me when I was'nt even looking at him
But when I asked him if we would have a second date he said that was a blunt question (he is German so don't know if that is correct etiquette) next day he sent me text sending me big hugs and continued throughout the day to banter on text - I did not hear from him for about 3 days and that was at my initiating, I sent very light email saying I returned home, hoped all was well, he responded by email, left messages on both my home phone and mobile, phoned me the next morning, continued banter throughout the day again by text -but still no questions re when am I next in town!!!!!!!!!! When can I see you again!!!!!!!!!!! I'm really confused by his behaviour, I'm assuming he is seeing other people, we live quite a distance from each other however he has'nt commited to even suggesting we meet half way etc.,
Can you help me to try to deal with this situation, as I really, really liked him, was attracted to him immediately and I felt he was experiencing the same feelings - is it because he is german or just not interested in me ??
Too nice
zaslal Vymazaný užívateľ v Fórum Nemecko
Well I came from Australia for my German girlfreind and she said I was "too romantic and too nice". I think she is maybe used to guys holding back their emotional feelings. For me. I love to express myself and tell a girl exactly how I feel in the moment. I never hold back. I don't think it matters what country you come from though. every person is different. I Australia, everything is so relaxed and easy going. I have never had a girl call me "too nice" before. Maybe I gave her too much. Ah well. Gotta find the right one!
Romantic
zaslal Nico Der Zauberer v Fórum Nemecko
If you are a romantic man, a lot of people in germany will call you a "Träumerle" - a dreaming boy. A lot of people in Germany think, Romantic persons are persons of yesterday and not a modern human being and forget the real life - or only want sex.
Romantic
zaslal Ms Arni v Fórum Nemecko
Romanticism, I think it just about personal touch and the way a person describe "romantic" it self. I dunno about another guy and I can't generalize every German guy, but all I know about my German guy that he is cold guy outside and warm guy inside. Well maybe for some peoples he isn't romantic one, but for me what he did was so sweet and romantic.
romanticism...
zaslal L. A. v Fórum Nemecko
I can't say whether most of german men are romantic or not, haven't met that many in my young life but all I can say is that the german men I've known and the ones i've been in a sort of relationship with have, for sure, a sweet personality behind their apparence.
Maybe to a woman like me it might be a little bit hard to reach their inner side, either because they are just uninterested in having you that close or because they have a wall all around them which is difficult to cross... but we can say this it's common to 80% of human population, can't we?When it comes to romanticism though I can clearly recall 2 german acquaintances of mine, a nice couple, arguing about Valentine's day.
He was very excited at the idea of celebrating it but she made clear in front of everyone that they weren't going to celebrate anything (her own words), he seemed quite disappointed and didn't reply back... I thought it was really nice of him wanting to do something with her in that day or just receive/give a present as a thought but, who knows why, she couldn't stand it and acted so harshly (for the sake of clarity I have to say she is generally a real sweetie pie).
I myself am one of those people who don't celebrate Valentine's day but it's difficult not to be touched by your sweetheart if he expresses such a tender little and simple desire as celebrating Valentine's day, after all it's not such a big deal and if it makes him feel happy why not? And I've to admit it touched me a lot to see that "macho"and most of the time "cold guy" ask for that. It did indeed, so when I looked at his face, his gaze down at his shoes and in that silence, I couldn't help feeling sad, terribly sad for him.
That moment is still stuck in my mind but probably it was more relevant to me than it was to him, maybe he, as a man, doesn't really care about what happened and neither remember it.The point is it might be that if some men are unable to show romanticism maybe it depends on the fact that in their lives they have never had the chance to show their deepest feelings (either with their own family/girlfriend or on a day everyone has officially an excuse to say and do silly, adolescent things, as in the case of my friend), so eventually these guys grow up as sweet persons with little ability to show their sweetness, let's not talk about being romantic.
Sometimes people have just to learn how to show what they feel or they have to have the possibility to do it... and unfortunately sometimes other people, or society they are in, prevent them from it.
Just my mere point of view, of course not the universal truth!Anyway it's not such a big deal if the guy is not a Romeo!
The problem for women is to understand the german man they are talking to, the one who fits in the stereotype (and they -sigh- do exist).
If you (as a woman) have been taught that a man shows interest through nice actions and words then of course you get quite confused by the guy who you are dating or simply trying to get close to if he barely says a nice word, make a compliment and treats you as much kindly as the other women.
What I mean is that it can be discouraging and difficult for a woman to get closer to a man who is like a Sudoku and it's all up to you to make match the numbers in that friendship/relationship.Here on this forum we say that generally men from Germany are straightforward and when-if they say or do something they really mean it.
Well, a part from the fact that it takes forever before they say or do something... let's not forget that men are men, they are out of the same mould so... if they say something deep either they are drunk or they are going to pretend they never did/ they don't remember/it was a slip of the tongue/ they were having one of their ups and downs moments. Ha, men! (just joking, don't get angry)Bad impression ?????
zaslal Ed McGowan v Fórum Nemecko
Well when I read some comments it turns my stomach, full of bias and prejudice, people especially in Germany are so different and there are so many mentalities, one has just to be open, I worked in different countries in the last few years and the majority of people I met where nice and friendly.